Dear Agony Aunt…

Dear Ruby,
I wanted to talk to you about my 13 year old dog. My Leon was sick, he had cancer and he died on April 1st. I have many memories of him. On the day I was born he came to me and played with me. The thing is, I wanted to ask you if you have any tips for me to not cry everyday after school. My family and I really miss him. He was the nicest dog of all time. He had never bitten a kid or a dog in his life. The thing is, I can’t stop thinking about him. When I see a dog with a bad family, I think maybe I should take the dog with me. In the Easter break me and my family saw many dogs on the beach of Cabo Verde. Even my mom called a dog Lucy, she was a girl and maybe five years old, so a young dog. Lucy and my parents always met her on the beach when they took a walk. I mean every dog deserves a fair life even if they have three or only two legs. They can always show you their heart, just like my dog. Sometimes I think I didn’t spend enough time with Leon. I am really sad about him because he was so sick that he could not walk anymore. I am also proud of Leon because he could already have died two years earlier. He had a heart attack in the morning before my school day, during a walk. My dad saved his life, he brought him to the vet within five minutes. After school, I came home and everything was okay. I know it is sad but I hope you understand the problem and can give me good advice. Many thanks!
Sincerely yours, Alex

Dear Alex,
I read your sad letter. I can give you some advice. I know it’s hard, but maybe you could think of things that make you happy. Meeting new dogs can also help. It’s nice of your parents that they met Lucy, and took her on walks on the beach. I agree with you that even a dog with three or two legs can give their love. I am sure Leon’s life was the best a dog can have. And he lived a very long life. 13 years in dog’s years is 91 years in human years, that is a lot. But life is life. I think that you knew that he would die. I know it hurts very much that you lost your dog, but I think you can stop crying. I don’t want to say that you should not think of him any more, but you can manage it with time, I know it. You will always remember the happy times with Leon, when you played together or when he made you laugh. He will always be your best friend in your memories. I hope I was able to help you, Alex. I was really touched by your letter, and I am sure you will be okay and smiling when thinking about Leon.
Best regards, Ruby

Alexander M.

Dear Ruby,
I have a problem with my best friend and I hope you can help me. Since the first grade I have had a best friend (let‘s call her Anna). We’ve always done everything together, met to play and celebrated our birthdays together. That all ended in 5th grade (approx. one year ago), when she met a new girl that is also in our class (let‘s call her Mia). From then on, almost everything changed to the worst. She always spend her free time like vacations or weekends with Mia. She also did things with me but not as much as before and when they are visiting each other they have lots of fun. They always make jokes and spend the breaks together. Anna and I are still friends but not best friends anymore. She thinks that I only am a good friend but Mia is her best friend.
What can I do?
Best regards, Emma

Dear Emma,
I understand your problem and the situation in which you are well. When I was in school, a couple of years ago, I also had a best friend. I always thought that nothing could break our relationship, when she suddently stopped talking to me. Everytime I wanted to tell her something she just ignored me. Then she found new friends and I was very jealous.
Are you jealous when you see Anna? What feelings do you have when Anna and Mia spend time together? At one point, I couldn‘t take it anymore and I talked to her seriously and asked her why she‘s ignoring me. Can you imagine what she said? She thought I don‘t want to have contact to her because another gitrl told her I was talking about her behind her back. Now we have been best friends for five years! So I think you should talk to Anna and tell her about your feelings when you see her with Mia. Ask her why you aren‘t so much in touch anymore. And if this doesn‘t work, don‘t worry, you‘ll find new friends, I‘m sure!
Kind regards, Ruby

Ishara N.

Dear Ruby,
Yesterday, I talked to my friend about our problem we had in the past, when my friend posted photos with her new friends on the social media site, we both use. But she didn’t understand what my problem is. Then, I wanted to explain it to her again. I thought she now understands what I mean. After that we went to dog school with our dogs. But one day later, she posted new photos with her new friends again. And I felt sad, but also jealous again. Why didn’t she post any photos with our dogs at dog school? I can’t understand that. Could you give me some advice, please? That would be very nice of you.
Best regards, Nancy

Dear Nancy,
If I’ve understood your problem, you talked with your friend about your last problem, but your friend didn’t understand you and posted new photos with her new friend. First, I want to ask you the following questions:
How did you talk to your friend? Were you friendly enough? And please know: I know how you feel, because I had the same problem when I was younger. And I will help you to solve this problem. Okay. First, I would talk to your friend again and I would ask if your friend understands the problem or not. And if your friend doesn’t understand you, you ask why. Then you explain it to your friend in a different way than before. I hope you will solve the problem with your friend together.
Best regards, Ruby
Tom K.

Dear Ruby,
My name is Rodrick and I have a problem with my mother because we had a big discussion on driving my mom ́s car. She didn’t like my idea on driving it and the next morning she did not say a word to me. She is ignoring me, isn’t she?
I could hear her last night, talking with my dad about me and she wasn’t feeling well. My dad told me what she was talking about at the kitchen table. He said that I have to live at my uncle‘s house for a week for misbehaving, but I just asked for a car to drive to my friend‘s house and I get in trouble because of it.
They said: ’It‘s for your own good.’ But what do they mean by ‘my own good’? People say that my mum is strict. Is she? I love my mom but I think she’s too strict somtimes, isn’t she? Ruby I don’t know what I should do to fix my problem?
I hope you are able to help.
Best regards, Rodrick

Dear Rodrick,
I read that you had a problem with your mom. Your story takes me back to when I was younger, as young as you are. I wanted to drive my mom’s car too but that time I wanted to drive shopping , my mom wasn’t happy either. So I stopped asking and accepted it. Ask your mom directly, she does this for your own good. Why did she sent you away? Why is your mother so strict and why was she so upset with you? How long had you stayed by your uncle’s house? How upset are you about this? Ask your uncle to drive you to your friend’s house instead of driving there on your own. I hope that your uncle is not so strict and can bring you there. Best of luck!
Kind regards, Ruby
Minh-Dat Nguyen

Dear agony aunt,
I‘m writing you a letter, because I want to tell you about my problem and I need your help. I have a conflict with my friend Liza and it is all my fault, because I made a big mistake. It was Tuesday and we had break at school. Liza and I were laughing and making jokes, but then I made the mistake. I called her „dumb and ugly“ by mistake. I didn‘t want to and also I don‘t think she is dumb or ugly, I just said it. When I realized what I had just said, I said sorry and sorry all the time, but she just ignored me and walked away. I apologized, every day after this, but she just ignored me and she didn‘t want to talk to me. I don‘t know, what I should do. So I‘m asking you if you can give me some advice, because I also really miss her.
Kind regards, Melanie

Dear Melanie,
I read your letter and I understand your problem. I understand that you really miss her and that you said these words by mistake. But I also have some questions for you:
Did you only say sorry? Did you tell your parents? Did she hear, that you said sorry? I only wanted to say that it‘s all going to be alright. Here is some advice from me to you: You should give Liza some time and space.
Don‘t say sorry every day and just give her some space, because sometimes it can really get on someone’s nerves. And after some days you can write her a letter, that you are really sorry for what you did and that you want to be friends again. I hope this helps you.
Kind regards, Ella

CB